I wish....

I wish....
..that just once those I love could feel the pain I have when I am hurting, so they know what I am going through. That they would have the struggle of getting out of the chair, so they know how hard it is. that they would feel the pain standing at the sink doing dishes or at the stove trying hard to get a meal on the table without crying.

..that my daughter would understand when I just cannot hurry or do something that needs done

..that my son would know just how much it means to me when he offers a hand out of the truck on days I just cannot do it alone. or that arm up the steps, or the "mom let me carry that"

..my husband knew just how much he really means to me. words never seem enough. And just how much he is appreciated, again words never seem enough.

..that i could do more of the things I used to do, like going for that walk with my husband, or the bike ride, or shopping in the mall just for the fun of going.


Honestly, No I do not wish the pain on anyone, not my family, not my friends or anyone else. But I do wish for the understanding that I am going through this, and it will not get better, only worse...that some days I just cannot...cannot shop, cannot walk, cannot get up to go look out the door...cannot.

I am thankful that it is I that am struggling though this now, and not my kids, or my husband, or friends. I am thankful that they can go shopping, bike riding, walking. I am thankful for the day that the pain is not so much, that I can go look at the yard, or go to the store, or just go for a ride in the pickup.

People always take the little things for granted...I know I used to. Remember when shopping for Christmas that there are those that would love to go, and cannot. Be thankful you can.

Because I wish......Everyone could.